Learn the art of seduction.
LBD Ladies Night on Tuesday was such a sexy evening! We got some tips on how to seduce from Mandisa Mathlobo, the Queen of Seduction. I’m not going to share her tips with you because I really think you should go on one of her courses. What I am going to share is an article I read some time ago written by Shari Locker.
The art of seduction is well within anyone’s reach. All you need to learn are a few simple techniques that will exert such a powerful force, you won’t know how you ever dated without them.
Reach out and touch someone
When you feel ready and raring to get closer to your date, touch is often the ticket.
Not only does it forge an instant physical connection, the warmth of your hand on the small of your date’s back, shoulder, or knee will get his or her mind racing.
Women will often touch their date’s arm while telling them a story. Some men have found success is playing with their date’s hair. Not sure I’m mad about this one on a first date or even a second!
Turn down the volume on your conversation
You can use conversation to cast a spell on the object of your affections. In this case, it’s often not what you say, but how you say it.
People who talk loudly and jovially can be the life of the party, but speaking softly actually packs much more punch in the turn-on department. Your date will probably lean in a little closer to catch what you’re saying—and that’s always a plus.
He or she may also get the feeling that you don’t want anyone else to hear what you’re saying, adding a nice umbrella of privacy and intimacy to your conversation, even better, try whispering in your amour’s ear.
Take it slow and sensual
Seems obvious, but it’s easy to forget: Getting your date hot and bothered largely boils down to tapping into your natural sensuality.
Remind yourself to slow down and be sexy when you walk, or to take a bite of food while looking at him at the same time.
To help you along, steer date night conversation away from topics like bird flu and focus on more sensual topics, like your trip to Mozambique or how amazing your tiramisu tastes.
Enhance the sexy mood by looking at your date’s lips or into his or her eyes… and think about what it would be like to be kissing. Trust me, your date will notice a difference, and things will shift to a more intimate level.
Smooth-talk your way into a kiss
Leaning in for that first kiss is largely a leap of faith—you never truly know if your date’s glad you did until you pucker up and go for it. But believe it or not, smooth operators have come up with some strategies to ease into it.
“When I want to seduce someone, I’m kind of playful about it,” says Mark. “At a point during the night when I want to kiss her, I’ll whisper, ‘What would you say if I kissed you right now?’ It tells her that I want to kiss her, builds some sexual tension—and if she doesn’t want to kiss me, she can say so before I go for it.”
Go for the give-and-take
Seductive types send “I want you” signals early and often — a tap on the knee or arm to emphasize a point or a compliment like “You look amazing in that shirt” — and they wait for the object of their affections to respond before inching ahead.
Seduction is a give and take. I don’t think it’s necessarily up to the guy to make all the moves. Seduction should be a slow, sexy exchange.
Dates don’t consist of him putting the moves on her, but rather a back and forth flirtation. For example, over dinner, tell her how beautiful she is, then she could touch my arm, and then he pours her wine. This is foreplay at its best.